Blog
Outline of Me
10/25/2021 by Matt LewellynEvery one of us, at some point in life, took out a hammer and chisel, and we etched an outline of how we thought and felt about ourselves. We engraved that list in our brains, of "I'm good at this, but I'm really bad at that."
That's how we like to interact with reality. But reality often has a different idea, and it throws a curveball.
Under the Microscope
10/9/2021 by Matt LewellynWe used that microscope and zoomed way in. Somewhere along the line, our eyes darted across the part of us that is relationship. And what we saw there... Well, it's horrifying.
We wondered why we weren't hearing God's voice clearly. We wondered why the joy just wasn't there most of the time. We wondered why, despite our best efforts, we felt like second-class Christians. And now we knew.
Mind the Gap
10/2/2021 by Matt LewellynHow do we bring the “liking gap” to God? Well, it's very easy to submit to confirmation bias in our self-talk. The path of least resistance for those who feel less-than is to function as if God, as glorious as he is, does not have the time of day for us. That his longsuffering allows him to tolerate us, but the material of the relationship between us can never be more than that.
[Un]happy
9/24/2021 by Matt LewellynWe were most satisfied when people said things that should make us unhappy. We can fool ourselves into thinking it's a good thing because we're also mercilessly tearing ourselves down. Pain for a moment, but it's for the greater good, right? Right?
Well, no. It isn't.
Empathy: Vice? Virtue?
9/19/2021 by Matt LewellynWe have those who would tell us what we should and should not feel, and how we ought to viscerally react. This goes beyond regulation of action and word.
Such teaching reaches into the core of our being and either makes us glad we passed the test, or shames us horribly for the basic ways we interact with the world.
A Fundamental Disconnect
9/12/2021 by Matt LewellynPeople who have grown up in evangelicalism have recognized that there are ways and means and manners in the subjective life of evangelical Christendom that are antithetical to the very gospel it espouses.
Moment of truth for the church: how do we react? The strongest voices within the camp are content to say these are marginal experiences. I.e. smile and wave, move along, nothing to see here. Does that seem right to you?
Who Do You Think I Am?
9/7/2021 by Matt LewellynIf we're honest, we're happy to mimic the best, because we think we don't have enough energy/knowledge/motivation in the tank to be the best. We know this, because we've learned that real activity leads to real exhaustion. I know that what I make, what I teach, and how I interact will be objects of my inner critic, and therefore lead to a soul-centered exhaustion that can last for days on end.
Let us Make God in our Image, in our Likeness
8/31/2021 by Matt Lewellyn"Make God in our image?" you say, incredulous to even consider it. I mean, seriously, our conception of God has no bearing whatsoever on the reality of who he is. But to think about God, we need to have a mental representation of him. And to relate with God, we need much more than that.
Who’s With Me?
8/26/2021 by Matt LewellynThe fog is not exclusive to Christianity, nor is it limited to the functional hurting. Almost everyone experiences the fog to some extent, at some point in life. Those who visit it with awareness can develop empathy for those who dwell there consistently.
Sickness and Syndrome of the Soul
8/15/2021 by Matt LewellynChrist dwelt among us not to be served as a king, but to serve others in sacrifice. He gave of his time, money, energy, wisdom, and influence to bring healing both physically and spiritually. In our own lives, we now exhort each other to serve and not be served, but in doing so, we miss a nuance that carries great consequence for the wounded souls in our midst.